Random Thoughts of the Week: May 24th-30th

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  • Having to pee and a bumpy road…not a great combo.

Have To Pee

  • I hate, hate, when I’m grocery shopping with someone and the person who is paying (which is usually my mother) tells me to stay in line while they go grab something. No, where are you going? Don’t leave me here.

Don't Go

  • I guarantee everyone has at least one pair of socks that is no longer a pair. Where do they go? Because it’s not like I’m letting this asshole do my laundry.

Laundry Throw

  • A guy walked up to me and asked, “ma’am, do you work here?” What gives it away sir? My shirt with the company name on it or the fact that I’m sweeping? Nice guy, but stupid question.

UHH

  • A guy was buying his tickets out of the automated machine, and when his tickets didn’t drop down he flipped his shit. My manager told him that they sometimes just get stuck in the printer slot and his response was, “You know what would fix that? A shotgun.”

What The Fuck's Wrong With You

  • Do you ever just look around and think about how none of the things you see used to be there and how crazy that is? Or am I the only person fascinated by that kind of thing? The other day I was sitting at a red light and looking around at all the cars that had the new state license plates, which lead me to think about how many people buy new cars all the time. That made me think about how many cars are made yearly, which made me think about how there didn’t used to be cars at all. Just me? Alright.

Just Me

  • Speaking of cars, I’m pretty sure mechanics just try and take advantage of the fact that women don’t know anything about cars. Unfortunately for them I’m too cheap to buy into their bullshit, both figuratively and literally.

Nice Try

  • As I was waiting for the guys to finish working on my car, I heard and ad for a mattress sale being extended to the end of May. My question: are mattresses ever not on sale?

Just Sayin

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