- Anytime I see a work van driving under the speed limit I assume that something illegal/creepy is going on.
- I wouldn’t say I’m more of a hugger these days, but I’ve become more accustomed to them. I haven’t really had a choice, because I’ve started hanging out with my friend’s other group of friends and they’re all big on hugging. So I’ve accepted that it’s gonna happen, there’s no way around it.
- An older woman told me I had a beautiful smile, and that I probably get that all the time.
- I saw a child, probably 15, wearing a “party with sluts” hat.
- Some of our exit doors at work have signs that say, “emergency exit only, door is alarmed” and this old couple started going towards them to leave. I told them that they’ll need to use the other doors, but apparently they didn’t hear me because the woman read the sign out loud and they still decided to go out of them.
- At an intersection, my light turns green and I obviously start to go. However, the asshole on the street going horizontal of mine, who has been sitting at his red light, decides he feels like turning on his red light….almost hitting me. Sir, what the fuck are you doing?
- The only time I like running into people I went to high school with is when we can gossip about the stupid shit other people we went to high school with are doing with their lives.
- My coworker, the hangnail/use-a-key-to-clean-his-ear/told-my-manager-he-had-diarrhea-guy, asked if someone could cover for him because he’d “been holding it for a while.”
- My weekend as a bunny starts tomorrow, so if any of you need to be entertained stop by my work and you’ll have a good laugh.