Random Thoughts of the Week: November 23rd-29th

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  • I don’t like having a bunch of boys in the house for thanksgiving…there’s pee all over the toilet bowl.

  • If you have a cart on Black Friday I hate you. There are a shit ton of people crammed into a small aisle, and then you fuckers think you’re going to get your cart through there! If you can’t carry it then you don’t get it, those would be my rules; you better bring your fucking kids and make them carry something!

  • On that note, I had a woman hit the back of me at least 5 times with her cart. It wasn’t completely her fault because she was trying to get out of the way of someone else with a cart that was going the wrong way. It’s like a fucking road people; each side is for one direction. Those people probably can’t drive either.

  • I always think it’s funny when people post a status or something about how much they love their significant other and how they’re going to be together forever and then a few hours later they break up.

  • A guy came out of Lincoln and proceeded to talk for 10-15 minutes about the battle of Gettysburg. Sir, that’s really cool, but I’ve got a job to do.

  • Two of my coworkers were talking about AIDS and one of them seriously thought that it started specifically because of anal sex. When I told him he was wrong he said, “oh yeah, wasn’t it monkeys?” Implying that someone had sex with a monkey and then spread it to someone else. Just stop. Who teaches these people?

  • To my neighbors across the street, it’s Black Friday not 4th of July or New Years; why are you shooting off fireworks?

  • If you ever invite yourself to a gathering then you’re an asshole. Also, if you invite yourself and then don’t offer to pay for something, when the thing you’re doing costs $60 a person, you should be fucking ashamed of yourself.

  • On that note, if you invite someone to a shindig without telling the people you’re originally going with then you’re an asshole too. Especially when that person is like the person described above.

  • I love hypocrites!

  • Apparently the video for my project got corrupted somehow, or my iMovie is just fucked up, but hours worth of work was thrown out the window.

  • I worked with 3 people that apparently don’t know how to talk above a whisper. It was like being in the middle of fucking “Horton Hears a Who” back there. I had to say “what?” about 5 times until I finally knew what they were saying.

  • Why do people spend money on trying to make their car look cool when they drive a stupid car? Hey cool rims…on your VW Beetle.

  • My group has to present on Friday and I had two of my group members ask me what day we had to go. Were they just planning on showing up and hoping they pick the right day?

  • If you read this every week then you probably remember me talking about Starbursts-and-a-Coke guy, the one who never brings a pen to class. He asked me for a pen on Tuesday and he said, “I’m sorry, I know I ask every time.” If you’re sorry then go buy a fucking pen and stop asking me!

  • We are getting our performance reviews at work and I’ve yet again gotten a less than great score on friendliness. Listen, how many times do I need to fucking talk about this? Just because I don’t smile like a fucking lunatic all the time doesn’t mean I’m not friendly! Just because I don’t like any if my coworkers doesn’t…no, I should probably get an unsatisfactory in that regard, but I’m fucking helpful as shit with the people I actually need to be nice to.

  • To the Verizon guy I talked to, you are a fucking idiot. You didn’t know shit! When I tell you I’m switching services and ask what day I need to shut off verizon so I don’t get another outrageous bill don’t try and sell me on how great you guys are! You and your company are a piece of shit. Fuck you very much!

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