Random Thoughts of the Week: July 13th- 19th

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  • I’m pretty sure that I spend 3/4 of my time with my parents and/or siblings. Whether that’s because my parents/siblings are cool or because I don’t have any friends…we may never know. Actually I’m pretty sure the reason is both; my parents and siblings are awesome and 95%, who am I kidding probably 99%, of people I run into are stupid.

  • A girl I work with tore a ligament in her leg when she tried to get away from someone who was trying to tickle her. Let me give you some advice: don’t tickle people! Nobody likes to be tickled, in fact, that’s a good way to get punched in the face. If I ever tore a ligament in my leg because I was trying to escape being tickled, I would take a knife to that person’s ligament so they could feel my pain.

  • I had a coworker ask me if I wanted to go to her Mary Kay party; the incentive was that it’s free….yeah, so is torture.

  • Saw another child wearing something that no child should wear; the only way I can describe it would be as a half-a-shirt. I should not be able to see your stomach.

  • She was probably 11 or 12 so her mother is still buying her clothes. To the mother that bought that shirt: what were you thinking?! You probably spent $20 dollars on HALF of a shirt. Why not spend $2o dollars on a whole shirt? Also, don’t let your fucking kid out in skimpy looking clothes, it’s disgusting.

  • I had a girl I work with make a comment about a guy we work with being a rich boy because he’s going to buy an iPad. She says that as she’s driving around in a brand new Mitsubishi Eclipse, carrying her own iPad, talking about how she’s getting a new MacBook for graduation, and how her current Mac isn’t syncing with her iPhone 4….

  • I hate trying to find lids for Tupperware containers. You grab one thinking it’s going to fit because it looks the right size, but no it doesn’t! They all look the same!

  • I overheard a group of young women talking about how people pronounce crayon. We used to have that discussion all the time in high school. I used to pronounce it “crown” and my friends gave me so much shit for it, but I had a friend who pronounced it “cran.” They said that that was better than crown…I don’t see how, but whatever, they won; I now pronounce it the correct way (which isn’t cran!)

  • Anytime I see a grasshopper I think of Hopper from A Bug’s Life; clearly I’m super mature.

  • I HATE when someone brings something back around to their race. I’m not making fun of you because you’re black; I’m making fun of you because I think you’re a moron.

  • I am forever amused by people who try to be cute and it just doesn’t work out. 

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