So I’m posting on Thursday because Alex posted on Tuesday, and my OCD forces me to stick to the every other day schedule.
So it’s officially December and that means I need to change my Facebook profile picture to the Grinch. I’m almost positive that people think I hate absolutely everything based off of the permanent judgmental look I have.
Seriously though, I always look like I’m pissed and that I hate the world but I’m usually not that angry or hateful. I must say that I do probably have a heart that is too small though, and around Christmas time it does grow a little bit. I wouldn’t say three sizes, but it does grow.
I wouldn’t say that I hate Christmas, but it tends to pose a few problems for me. I still like decorating the tree with my mom and making cookies and other treats with her, but I do not like the present aspect. I never know what to tell people to get me, and opening the presents is a-whole-nother debacle. I am lucky enough to have everything I would want or need, and I’m thankful for that. Also, I am probably the worst present opener there is; I don’t know how to express the right emotion when I need to. I’m not an excitable person, so when I open presents I don’t look happy or excited even though I might be. Then, I get an extremely weird or unfortunate gift and I can’t fake a good reaction to save my life. Considering, I don’t have a good reaction when I genuinely like a present…I definitely don’t have a good fake enthusiastic response to use. I’m sitting there like this…
To me, Christmas time is just another month of the year with more to do and more money people have to spend. With that being said, I like buying people presents because I like making people happy. Which, again just makes things awkward because they’ll get me presents and I don’t know what to do or say and I just come off looking like a big bitch. I’m just glad that my friends and family know me well enough to know that even if I don’t show it, I am grateful and happy for everything…at least I hope so.
Also, can I just say that I love Christmas music, not because it reminds me of Christmas or gets me excited for the holiday (because I listen to it all year round); I just like it for its musical qualities and it’s nice to listen to.
Reading back through this post I’ve realized that it’s pretty shitty and poorly written. So, forgive me for that and come back next week and hopefully I’ll have a better topic that I didn’t just think about for a minute.